Dating Tips For Women

HERE'S WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT DATING LIFE AND HOW YOUR DESIRE TO BE INDEPENDENT MAY BE CAUSING ISSUES.

I have included 5 importan dating tips for women specifically in our modern age. First, i would like to announce that this difficulties and tips aren't always fair and i definitely do not want to imply that all men and women are a certain way. While i generalize here, please leave any and all comments with your thoughts and experiences. I'd love to hear them. So here we go. In the words of Beyonce, " All the Single Ladies!" Listen up : Here's what you need to know about your dating life !

Dating Tips for Women: #1

Be Mindful of How Your Independence Plays a Role in Your Dating Life

Do you feel the need to be independently successful in your career, in finances, with your emotions? Most modern women feel the need to be independently wealthy and are encouraged by our societal shifts to be independently driven in many ways. We’ve come so far from the traditional nuclear prototypes of gender roles.   On one hand this shift from traditional gender roles give women the permission to work hard and be financially independent if they choose to. On the other hand, it can feel like a tremendous pressure to be “successful” on all levels independently, which leaves some women feeling like a failure either way. (I mean, why wouldn’t it? Those are a lot of balls to juggle by yourself!)

Dating Tips for Women: #2

Don’t Play Too Many Games

I get it, realistically, you kind of have to play the game to some degree when you are dating. You are getting to know so many different types of people; you’re trying to break through barriers and find a potential connection. However, I would advise that you don’t spend too much of your time stressing about all the superficial rules… that really don’t even matter in the grand scheme of things  Petty “rules” of not returning text messages within 2 hours of them sending a message, or Snap Chatting just to tease them when you’re out with girlfriends is just plain pointless. If you want to attract a man that is intrigued by your intellect; that can connect with you emotionally and shares core values with you, then you shouldn’t have to worry about who wins these petty games. If he is mature and has the depth you are looking for, then you will know without having to entertain each other with the superficial games. If he doesn’t respond to your texts after 4 hours every single time than maybe you opt out of that game and find someone that is more attentive. I promise you, by eliminating most of the modern games, you then become the real professional.

Dating Tips for Women: #3

Don’t Let Yourself Be “Too Business”

We get it! You probably kick a lot of butt at the office and you should be proud of yourself for that; but being too business in your dating life may only cause your partner to feel insecure, threatened and/or annoyed, which could lead to competing against each other. This is harmful to a relationship because neither of you will let your guards down if you’re both making the assumptions that you have to be better than the other. I promise you, this is a recipe for disaster and should be avoided at all costs!!To really avoid this, think about what you want in a partner. Maybe write it down. Then ask yourself how realistic are my expectations/desires/needs? For example, if you want a man to be “successful in his career,” then really identify what that means. Is it a salary amount? A lifestyle? Values? Is it that you don’t want them torely on you? If it’s important to you that your partner has a “successful career,” then ask yourself “Whyis this important?”Then, ask yourself “How do I see myself supporting them with their career? How do I see themsupporting me? How could we possibly be partners, not competitors?” 

Dating Tips for Women: #4

Be Straight Forward, but Soft.

A lot of my single women Friends portray an amazing self confidence. They make good money for themselves, they are educated, well traveled; highly functioning and intelligent. They are all around really “great catches.” Unfortunately, most of them are struggling with the same issue; they can’t find the “right guy.” Of course, I don’t have a magic wand and can’t create Prince Charming, but I do help my friends  look within to strengthen themselves and make internal/external shifts. These changes can ultimately help my clients show up in the world differently; help them redefine their dating search to help create real connection. It gives them permission to see themselves and align their values, roles and expectations with their authentic selves.  I hear many of my female friends  say, “I don’t beat around the bush when I’m dating. I’m too old to waste time. So after the first or second date, I am very straight forward about what I want and if they don’t align with that, I’m on to the next person.” To be honest, I actually think this can be great. I think communicating your intention right off the back is really healthy and can eliminate a lot of pain and frustration in the long run. The only slight tip I would advise here, is to be soft with your requests and be a little bit more patient! Sometimes connection takes a little time to cultiva.

Dating Tips for Women: #5

Redefine Your Expectations of Where You Think You “Should Be” (Especially at Your Age)

This can be a big influence, whether or not you know it.. We are building our careers and going on adventures before we really feel the desire to settle down and invest in a family or partner. This is OK, but understanding how it may be impacting you is important. I have many clients (men and women) that start to feel regretful and sad by their decisions to prioritize their careers prior to a family, and when they find themselves at thirty-something, they feel lonely and discouraged with the dating world.   Just try to remember, that you’re not alone in this. Your life does not have to follow any type of expected “timeline” and you still have choices to create a life that means something to you. Yes, we cannot deny our biological clocks, but putting a lot of effort in stressing about it is only making you feel worse about yourself and your situation. You are not the only person out there that has not “settled” down at your age.